Just A Friend Revisited
If you are an avid reader of this blog you all read my warning about the person that you have deemed as your opposite sex “Friend.” Well guess what, apparently everyone did not take heed to my warning, and more importantly, I am so over the “friend,” thus it must be revisited.
But I will give this person the benefit of the doubt, I am assuming that their utterly out of place comments and actions occur because they may be unaware that they are this “friend.” So as usual I have compiled a list to aide you guys in figuring out if you fit into this category or not. I mean I am here to help!!
You Are in the “Just A Friend” category when:
1. You are constantly questioning the situation that your opposite sex friend is in. Situation includes but is not limited to: low key relationships, out in the open relationships, cut buddy relationships or maybe even friendships. You are always asking your friend why they are involved in this?? or what is it that keeps you in this situation?? Realize that You’re a hater, if you do this and if the girl or guy involved has not Chris Browned your friend, has an STD, is an all around bad person or has slept with your friends brother or sister then you need not comment.
2. You are constantly making comments to the non friend in the situation. Uh yeah I know you guys are like I wish a (insert obscene word here) would say something to me. But it happens, these people get incredibly bold and feel that they have the place to comment to whomever is involved. Never, I repeat never say any out the way comments to your friends situation. It is not your place, you are not involved therefore… (clears throat) don’t involve yourself. At the end of the day it makes you look like something possibly is going on with you two or you are crazy. Stop This.
3. You befriend your friends situation in order to bad talk your friend to them. This is just crazy, but it has happened to me. If you have suddenly become all buddy buddy with your friends situation out of a common interest, cool. But if you find yourself revealing that your friend has messed with so many people, or girl i could never see myself talking to this person because…, then you are a top candidate in the category.
All in all, if you are not involved in something, stay the hell up out of it. Neither person involved needs or wants you to add any validity to their situation and they are grown ass people so they can figure it out on their own. So keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself and if you get bored, find a hobby… take up knitting or something.
Peaches&Gumbo
Just A Friend
It’s Wednesday night and you are just wondering what the boo is doing. So you call him/her up to tell them you miss them or some other random gay shit. And what do you hear in the background. “The friend.” The opposite sex friend. The one whom your boo confides in about everything. I mean you can’t be mad, they have been friends since like 7th grade. But damn, who can’t help but feel a little insecurity when your Taye Diggs has a Sanaa Lathan. (Brown Sugar… just in case you didnt get it, lol)
I’ll never forget my first encounter with “the friend.” It was Valentine’s Day and me and the mans had a wonderful night planned. We had been together for only about 3 months so we weren’t doing anything extravagant. I prepared a bomb ass dinner with all of his favorite foods represented. Let’s just say everything was perfect. About an hour into our first V day together, his phone rings. I immediately give him the, don’t even think about answering glare, and he silences the phone. A couple minutes later the phone rings again, and wait world it rings yet again. Finally after 6, I repeat 6 freaking phone calls, I tell him to just pick up the damn phone… Must be an emergency right??? I know you are wondering who could have possibly been calling him so much and on Valentines Day.
Oh you know who it was, his best friend. His best “girl” friend. Apparently she had been stood up and needed someone to talk to because she could do nothing but cry. So what does my weak ass boyfriend suggest, well why don’t you just come over here and spend Valentine’s Day with us. WHAT!!! I don’t think I have ever been that pissed in my life.
Needless to say that was just the mere beginning of many ruined dates due to the “Home Girl.” Eventually I grew tired of the situation and had to bizounce. I am here to warn you…
BEWARE OF THE FRIEND!!!
It’s not hard to spot the friend, they are usually the person that your guy/girlfriend will introduce you to first. Because they want the opposite sex perspective on you. They wanna know if you add up to your very own peers. They also think that the friend will be able to immediately spot whether you are really into them or not. I mean personally, I see nothing wrong with these tactics. I actually believe that everyone should have this person in their life.
But sometimes, “The Friend” over steps their boundaries and ends up doing a little too much. For example, they always tend to call every time you are on a date, they may even show up. They always have something negative to add about every person you talk to, adding in the fact that no one is good enough for you. They make jokes and say things like, Oh how’s what’s her face doing? or how is your little boyfriend? See what I mean these things shouldn’t happen. And if they are, I have one thing to say… You have more than a friend on your hands buddy. Your “friend,” is desperately in love with you and probably has a sculpture with strands of your hair in his/her closet.
Just Beware, that’s all I am asking. Because you might miss out on that special person due to the person you have deemed, “Just a Friend.”
Peaches&Gumbo
There’s always One
Time to attack the friend groups of the world. Most people have a group of people in which they are seen often with. In high school we called ourselves CHSD, lol the memories. Shout out to the homies.
Ok I’m back. Now the friend group usually consists of 4 or 5 people that you hang out with. For example, you would call these 3 to 4 people up when going out and you could potentially need someone to jump in on a fight. I’ll give you a second to picture the group… do you have it yet??
So within the friend group you always have the following characters:
First up the elder of the group. The elder is the friend who goes out of their way to protect the group. They always have a little less fun than the rest of the group and they are usually the extreme cock blocker. The friends know that the elder is looking out for their best interest but damn it wouldn’t hurt to loosen up just a little bit.
Next up is the entertainer of the group. This person knows how to party and have fun. They bring out the fun in the group and most often stands in as the mediator when there is turmoil in the group. Because duh, it takes away the fun n stuff.
The messy friend is our next feature. This friend is always involved in some type of melodramatic antics. They always have something to say about everything and often takes up time complaining about every damn thing. You can catch them trying to fight at the club or talking loud at some random person at the grocery store. You secretly hate this friend but you keep them around because ya’ll have either been friends forever or because you simply feel empathetic or just purely obligated.
The loose friend is always in every group. This friend is down for whatever when it comes to the opposite sex or same sex. They never really tell you specifically who they talk to or if the rumors are true but you just kind of figure they are. You do not bring your significant other around this person out of fear that your friend has slept with them. You love your loose friend but would never sit on their toilet seat. You keep them around because face it, they know no one else could befriend them so they are the most loyal in the friend group.
Lastly you have the lame friend. Everyone has a lame in their friend group. This person is cool as hell but they just completely dress wack as hell or they have not entirely developed interpersonal skills. This is your true blue friend and they would do anything for you, even though you are sometimes embarrassed to be around them.
And for an added bonus we all have the friend who just can not get it together. They may still rock those inital shirts or wear big gaudy jewelry. Or no matter what they do their hair just won’t do something right. In essence they just can never get it quite right.
**So there you have it world, let me know if you disagree or agree about these characterizations. If you agree n stuff tell us about your wonderfully complex group of friends**
Peaches&Gumbo
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